BDSM PT1

I know what you are thinking, why is that girl in that position? or ain't this nice? but whatever you are thinking you have the right to think that way i mean what is all this anyway?

Whenever we hear the word "BDSM" its either you are thinking of the fifty shades of grey series which is both right and wrong ( its right because there were some BDSM elements in the series, its wrong because thats not what its all about, In fact people in the BDSM community hates the series because it placed a stigma on them) or you are thinking of things you feel only mentally deranged people engage in( this is wrong and funny). Now lets skip to the part where i explain everything about it(you are welcome).

WHAT IS BDSM?

Obviously, you must have noticed that "bdsm" is not an actual word but just a group of letters an Acronym. BDSM stands for bondage & discipline, domination & submission, sadism & masochism.

A variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, discipline etc and other related interpersonal dynamics. Participants usually derive pleasure from things such as inflicting pain and humiliation or being restrained - would be unpleasant under circumstances. Explicit sexual activity such as penetration may occur within a session, but its not essential. The fundamental principles of the exercise of bdsm require it should be performed with the informed consent of all parties involved.

There are terms like Dominant(dom) and Submissive(sub), the (dom) takes psychological control over the submissive, the term "top" and "bottom" are also used : the top is the instigator of an action while the bottom is the receiver. Sometimes the female-specific terms "mistress", "domme" or "dominatix" are used to describe a dominant woman instead of the gender neutral name "dom".

On a physical level, bdsm is commonly misconceived to be "all about pain" which is not true. Most often, though bdsm practitioners are primarily concerned with power, humiliation and pleasure. Not all aspect of bdsm include physical suffering at all, of all the three categories of bdsm only sadomasochism specifically requires pain and its usually pleasurable(wink wink).

In some bdsm sessions, the top exposes the bottom to a wide range of sensual experiences, for example : pinching, biting, scratching with fingernails, erotic spanking or the use of objects such as crops, whips, ice cubes(ooh la la) and erotic electrostimulation devices.

A BDSM ROOM OR DUNGEON 


TYPES OF BDSM PLAY

-Flogging
-Spanking
-Sexual Role play
-Tickle Torture
-Breast Torture
-Medical Play
-Golden Showers(urinating) or Rkelly(I'm laughing right now)
-Suspension
-Cock and Ball Torture (CBT)
- Animal Role Play
-Edgeplay .

Some Facts and Myths of BDSM 

 

BDSM is often portrayed as reckless, dangerous and unhealthy. Take fifty shades of grey for instance, Christian Grey's reason for enjoying sadomasochism(s & m) stem from his childhood abuse.

Television dramas often portray festishists as seedy, unethical lawbreakers. Participation in festishism & sadomasochism was considered a mental disorder. On the brighter side, attitudes about kink sex has shifted but people always forget that Humans always had a penchant for adventurous sex.

FACT: Safe words are a thing

Safe words are probably one of the most important norms that have spread across the community, even if people use them in different ways. Safe words are mostly used by bottoms/submissive to tell the top/dominant when they have reached their breaking points(they cant take no more). It might sound cheesy, but its a well established norm in bdsm.

FACT:It is not as spontaneous as mainstream media/culture make it out to be

If you think you are gonna stumble in a billionaire's red room(where you'll achieve multiple orgasms) is what bdsm is about, then you thought wrong . But that's not a bad thing "the sexual fantasy makes everything look so easy". 

BDSM is much more than tying someone up, you have to be cautious about things like the right place, the right equipment, if you can get the person out(of whatever bondage) if there's an emergency. There is a lot that goes into it but that does not make it less satisfying.

MYTH: BDSM is all about sex

Sex is not an essential part of the action. Some people like it for the power, role playing etc only. Its very possible to play around with bdsm without involving sex.

MYTH:If you're into BDSM, you must have a traumatic past

Hold it right there because a lot of people think anybody that engages in bdsm must be mentally disturbed(which is not true). In fact, i blame the fifty shades series for this popular misconception , not everybody is a "Christian Grey"( a stalker and abuser) - a 2013 study in the Journal of sexual medicine actually found that bdsm proponents were as mentally sound, if not more so, than people who weren't in it. 

Its safe to say BDSM is a recreational leisure rather than the expression of psychopathological expresses.

FACT: Fifty shades of grey is considered very cringeworthy in  the BDSM community

If you ever meet anybody deep in the bdsm community, here is a hint : don't ever talk about fifty shades of grey. While some people appreciate that the series helped spur interest and made it less stigmatized, other people (like me) take issue with the abusive, unhealthy relationship it portrays and the seriously unrealistic scenes.

All in all, it is not an accurate representation of the bdsm community.

       To be continued.

Stay Safe